In My Mind

The past 9 months was like a roller coaster ride. Monthly check - ups with the gynecologist, not to mention the weekly check - ups on the 9th month, watchful diet consisting of mostly fruits and vegetables, milk and prenatal vitamins, and my daily exercise ( walking ). Both my CNM (certified nurse midwife) and doctor told me time and again that I am in the low risk pregnancy and about to give birth normally. Recently I've given birth to a healthy baby girl named Janna Gillyn.

Dec. 05 is an unforgettable date. This is supposedly the debut of my niece. Around 1:00 p.m. I had spotting, my sister-in-law told me it is time to go to the hospital. My husband and I rushed to the hospital which is barely 2 minutes drive. After the usual routine the nurse informed me I am only 3 cm dilated and have to go home. Around 8:00 p.m. the pain worsens so we called and informed the hospital, the thing is, this time there's no vacant room available so we have no choice but to go to the main Kaiser Hospital which is an hour drive from home. The pain was unexplainable. I was squeezing my sister-in-law's hands so hard with every contraction, I could almost feel it breaking. Around 10:00 p.m. the contractions came every 5 minutes and I was 5 cm dilated. Actual labor lasted more than 2 hours.I was given Epidural and somehow the pain subsided and I could only feel pressure now. I tried pushing so hard and i was wondering why the baby won't come out. it was then when the attending physician informed me the baby was faced up instead of face down. If I tried pushing longer it would cause fetal distressed so they need to do a caesarean delivery. At that time I was exhausted and more concern with the baby so I said do whatever is best. They transferred me to OR and at 2:56 a.m. of Dec. 06, I've given birth to a healthy baby girl. My husband was with me all the time and witnessed it all.

I guess, it made him appreciate motherhood in general. Elderly were right. You have repay your own parents once you become a parent yourself. Being a mom myself now made me quits with what I owe my own mom. My husband and I are starting with the journey of parenthood and sleepless nights is just the beginning.

Posted by jaren at 2:27 PM 0 comments  

Pregnancy is one of the best thing that can ever happen to a woman. That's exactly what I feel. I feel euphoric and relieved that I am not sterile ( my husband and I was trying for years to conceive). With pregnancy comes a series of symptoms and effects. I was lucky I never felt morning sickness and my clinician told me based on my battery of tests that I am at the level of low risk pregnancy. The thing is...I am suffering from carpal tunnel syndrome. I encountered the word during my college days, but never imagined it to befall me.

Carpal tunnel happens when the median nerve, which runs from the forearm into the hand, becomes pressed or squeezed at the wrist. The median nerve controls sensations to the palm side of the thumb and fingers (although not the little finger), as well as impulses to some small muscles in the hand that allow the fingers and thumb to move. The carpal tunnel - a narrow, rigid passageway of ligament and bones at the base of the hand - houses the median nerve and tendons. Sometimes, thickening from irritated tendons or other swelling narrows the tunnel and causes the median nerve to be compressed. The result may be pain, weakness, or numbness in the hand and wrist, radiating up the arm.

Women could suffer carpal tunnel than man because women has smaller carpal tunnel. A lot of factors contribute to carpal tunnel. Some of these are hypothyroidism, work stress, rheumatoid arthritis or like my case, due to water retention because of pregnancy.

I started feeling pain and numbness down from my fingers up to my arms when I was in my 4th month of pregnancy. I couldn't sleep straight at night. I tend to woke up and shake my hands because of intense pain, and numbness. The pain would start from my fingers especially ny middle and ring fingers and would radiate to my elbow part. At times I cry. At first I dismissed what I'm feeling from my mind and say it'll go away. 2 weeks later, I eventually got an appointment with our primary physician and after some questions and tests he gave me a wrist support to wear during bedtime. That's a relief, I'm telling you. And more good news, he added it'll eventually disappear after I give birth. The bad news, I'm one of those few who suffer this during pregnancy. By the way, both hands are affected. And every time I wear those wrist support, My brother in law thinks I'm going to combat.

I slept better at night after that. I'm on my 7th month now, and recently, I noticed pain below my thumb that wasn't there before. I guess, It is due to more water retention and am praying it won't worsen.

Pregnancy certainly has it's ups and downs but the ups outweighs the downs. Simply looking forward to the birth of our "Janna" makes it all worthwhile.

Posted by jaren at 7:51 PM 1 comments  

Labels: carpal tunnel syndrome, pregnancy

I was out for a while. The reason was, my life turned a 360 degrees turn from my so called comfort zone. Since the arrival of my sister-in-law and her 5 children from the Phils. last June, things weren't the same anymore. I found myself dropping and picking 5 kids from different schools with about 15 minutes interval in between. What more my sis-in-law had a bout with depression.Everyone in the family tried everything to help her out. It can be stressing you know. So, in a way, my husband and I became the " substitute parents" so to speak. I had to juggle the time, add to the fact that I, myself attend classes in the morning. Things were up to my throat, but I missed blogging a lot. And I almost forgot to mention I'm in my 2nd trimester of pregnancy.
I guess, others have the same predicament as I have, or worst. One thing I realized though, never lose the sense of ME TIME...A time for oneself even for a brief 5 mins. to Taking time to smell the flowers, admiring a scenery,shopping, reading, talking to friends...the list is endless. It's one way of coping with stress and keeping the sanity intact. The highlight of all is looking forward to the birth of our daughter on December. This makes it all bearable. After all, life will never be complete without it's ups and downs.

Posted by jaren at 9:43 AM 0 comments  

Labels: Blogging, Family, Stress

Posted by jaren at 12:39 PM 1 comments  

Weeks ago my husband and I were ecstatic knowing we're going to have a baby soon. Members of the family are so observant of my actions. Kinda protective. Don't carry this, don't eat this because it's bad for you and the baby, just rest and eat plenty of vegetables and fruits, etc. I'm overwhelmed with all the attentions. Not that I'm complaining. =)

Before, I've heard from friends and relatives that when you're pregnant, you tend to feel lazy. I thought that was exaggeration. Well, maybe, there's some truth in it. I have finished all the chores I've planned to do for the day, BUT...only in my mind.My mind's so willing but my body isn't. I even don't take a bath for 2-3 days in a row. When prior to pregnancy I can't let the day passed without taking a bath. Funny. And the food cravings..wow! It shifts to a 360 degrees turn. One moment I want some Burrito, the next eggpie, and on other times pasta, meat, and soda. I don't drink soda except when there's no choice, but now..the smell alone seems so appetizing. My weird cravings though is the smell of my husband. I can't seem to have enough especially his after work smell. hahaha! Then, it was the exact opposite. And a lot more. I love taking afternoon naps now. Maybe, it's the hormones working.

I feel luckier than the other though, I'm going 11 weeks on the way, but I never felt sick the others. I felt nauseous one time or the other, but not that worst as vomiting, and can't digest food. I thank God for that.

It will still be months away before the baby comes and I still a have a lot to learn and experience, it will be another journey. A journey we welcome the most.

Posted by jaren at 2:15 PM 0 comments  

Labels: Family, pregnancy

Last friday night mama who passed away 3 years ago, came in my thought. Maybe, because mother's day was approaching. I felt the ache of missing her badly. That week also, it was confirmed I'm pregnant. It was also the reason why I'm emotional on that certain night. My husband and I are very happy of the good news and I was wondering what my mom's reaction would be if she's alive. I can feel her spirit that night. Watching over us and smiling as if assuring me everything will be okay. I cried for I know, there's no substitute for a mother's warmth and comfort when a child is in pain and the thought she won't be there to guide me when I give birth and raise my own child and my baby won't know his grandmother personally. It is heartbreaking, right? And a mother's wisdom is priceless. For sure, I'll feed him with stories about his grandmom and how good a person she was.That way, the memories will stay. And I can perfectly recall how excited she was of being a grandmother in the future. Unfortunately, she didn't experience it.

We offered prayers for her last mother's day, we can't visit her because we're thousand miles way. But I know, wherever we go she's still there guiding us along the way.

We love you so much ma! And we missed you so bad.

Posted by jaren at 2:59 PM 2 comments  

Labels: Family, mother

I mentioned earlier that my husband is a shopaholic. The very reason why he accumulated stuffs that he didn't even bother to use or wear.He is a newbie, and I can't help him either. All I know is browse through online store and that's it. Through surfing one can really compare what works better and user friendly. And when we stumble upon this ecommerce articles he became interested of how to be an online merchant.

It gives him a clear idea of how to start it up like a pro without the hassle. He has a sense of security because of its secure ecommerce software. A compelling place to start business with. And the buyer will have a great time shopping online with their shopping cart even for first timers. I will definitely help him with this one because i like this idea of having this business, having a store of my own, where a shopper became a merchant.

The enthusiasm indeed is contagious.

Posted by jaren at 9:08 PM 0 comments  

Labels: shopping